Being Yourself Is Cool

Hey Owlets,

If you read my Letter To My Younger Self, then you’ll know that I was not the most socially adept teenager. I spent most of my teen years in a corner feeling awkward with the “fat cheerleader” feeling- trying to fit in, but no matter what you do it doesn’t quite work.

Growing up, the whole idea of “fitting in” was a corner stone. Whatever I did, it was a case of trying to be “cool”. I use quotes, because as I’ve gotten older some wisdom has trickled in, and I now realise that being cool is completely subjective. As I grew up I realised that the cool girls go for a safety in numbers principle. That was never going to be an option for the fat, spotty 15 year old Becky, and I started to realise that what’s cool in my mind is being individual and not following the crowd.

As a radio presenter I started to get more confidence (apart from dodging the webcam because I hated my appearance) and wanted another outlet. I blogged on and off from 2014, and the main reason for the inconsistency was the issue of needing to dodge the camera. It’s rather difficult to be a blogger when you refuse to post your own picture. 

I slathered on the makeup like the cool girls did (15 year old me definitely needed less eyeliner) and tried to copy their style, and that’s where the main issue lies. I grew up when Victoria Beckham was a Queen, being thin was in and there was no such thing as plus size. At 12 I remember being a size 10 instead of fitting into children’s sizes like the populars and I felt like the world had ended.

As I grew up, I struggled with my confidence because when I opened the wardrobe I was faced with head-to-toe black or clothes that looked like they’d been stolen from my Nan’s closet. Then one day, things started to change. My aunty took me to the local mall when we visited her in Essex, and there was a plus size clothing shop. We’d never seen one in Bristol before, and both my mum and I left with full bags and, unusually for that time in the plus size clothing revolution, a bank balance that hadn’t been hit too hard. That evening I went to dinner in a bright floral top and denim shirt, and I have never felt so fabulous.

For my entire school life I had been trying to be a cool girl and suddenly I had been shown that I could just be myself. I’d always wanted to wear the latest trends, and that first plus size clothing store did them in a way that was cut for my body instead of me attempting to squeeze into something that didn’t fit. 

Fast forward a few years - the plus size revolution is strong. Curvy girls are all the rage, and we’re finally starting to be accepted instead of shamed, but that shaming has taught me a valuable lesson. All of the years that I spent trying to make trends work for me has shown me that you don’t NEED to follow fashion to the letter.

I now love to take one “trend” piece, and pair it with the things I already love. It’s okay not to be like everyone else, and being an individual is something that should be celebrated instead of shunned. This bomber jacket is from Yours. It’s something I’ve wanted to wear for so long, but didn’t think would suit me, and I didn’t think that I would have the confidence to take it off the hanger. 

Since I started blogging I have been inspired by some beautiful girls that show me that I can wear what I want, and quite frankly I don’t give a damn about what anyone else thinks as long as I’m happy. 

Just because you’re in a certain category, it doesn’t mean you should be put in a box and never break out of it. I love my bomber jacket, and I love skinny jeans that show my curves. I love big chunky scarves and floaty tops that I was told would make me look big. Most of all I love colour; something that I spent my younger years avoiding is suddenly my best friend. If you want to look fabulous plus size then it’s not about hiding the bumps. It’s about showing your personality.

So you know what? If you want those leather look trousers, buy them. If you want that sequin jacket you go for it. Pile on the colour, the pattern and the bling. You do you, and if you see someone staring it’s probably because they can’t get over how fabulous curves look, dressed up in your own personality

Plus size brands taught the awkward 15 year old “fat cheerleader” that being me was okay - I’m not perfect and I’m totally fine with that. I love my thick thighs and strange smile, and that’s exactly why I created The Owlet and entered this competition. You are fabulous, whether you’re a size 8, 18 or 30, and your personality and individuality is what makes you a cool girl.

Love and Feathers, 

 The Owlet 💜 

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